Healing

As many of you know, my journey the past 10 years or so was filled with lots of pain, questions and survival. When I was able to remove myself (5 years ago) from the surroundings that were causing me so much stress, the focus was on healing. What does Rose need to do to heal?

I have done counseling. I have friends I vent with, cry with, and laugh with. I have journaled (still do). I listen to music (all genres). I walk. I feel stronger and more myself than I did 5 years ago. So, am I healed? What does it mean to heal?

These are all questions I have been processing recently. So often I thought it meant reliving what I went through and "healing from it." There are more and more studies now that show "reliving the trauma" is not healthy. Reliving actually causes the brain to stay stuck in that mode and makes you weaker. One article I ready says it is like picking a scab until it never heals.

I know this to be true. When I was in the middle of my stress I had a scab on my nose that would not heal. I kept picking at it. It would not go away. There were times it would bleed at the most awkward moments. I always had to try and cover it with make-up. Since I have left the stress of that situation, that scab is gone. I don't have anything to pick and cause it to bleed. There was one time I had to deal with something related to the situation and what happened - that scab came back. Once the situation was done, the scab went away.

Why do we want to keep reliving the trauma and picking the scab? Why not move forward and know that you are stronger because of what happened?

There is more to show that psychology has missed the mark in some areas. "Healing" is one of them. People who have survived and moved forward are people who step back and use a mental tool to look at the "view from above." They want to be a tree rooted and strong, not a plant that withers at the first sign of wind and drought.

Don't get me wrong, healing must take place. Counseling can help. But, I think we have been approaching it wrong. I believe we need to get back to a place of strength and will to move forward no matter what. I know several people who are like this. They have the will power to keep going and focus, not on the past, but how to make the future better.

Today - if you know you need to heal from something that happened, stop and be strong. Be the person that says, this is not going to define me. I will put my roots deep so that the winds won't blow me over. I will move through the pain and heartache and not let it consume me.

Heal with help from the Creator, the Person Who loves you more than you can ever imagine. Believe that He has you here for a reason. Shift your mindset and then walk with that authority and wisdom and share it with those around you.

Love and blessings,

Rose