I have been pondering what to write. The word fear kept coming to my mind. I am tired of the fear that has encompassed this nation and world. The enemy has come in and taken away our freedom and thoughts. We now live from a place of fear, instead of a sound mind and self discipline.
My mind started thinking of this last week when people I know "tested positive." Others were sick, and of course the question was always, "Did you test? Were you positive?" I'm sorry, but I'm tired of the questions. I believe it instills fear inside of us. If we know someone tested positive we "don't want to be around them." If we know someone tested we immediately question who they were with and why they would have tested. Questions, questions and more questions... Most of the questions we can't answer.
I realize that this virus has done more harm than the normal flu. I realize that there are aspects about it that are still unknown. But, to live in fear of it, and to constantly question everyone around you - that does not bring community.
As my mind battled all these thoughts this weekend, I began to doubt myself. I began to question my abilities. I wondered why I am here and my purpose. At church this morning the first words spoken were from 2 Timothy 1:1-7
From Paul, an apostle of Jesus the Messiah, appointed by God’s pleasure to announce the wonderful promise of life found in Jesus, the anointed Messiah. My beloved son, I pray for a greater release of God’s grace, love, and total well-being to flow into your life from God our Father and from our Lord Jesus Christ! You know that I’ve been called to serve the God of my fathers with a clean conscience. Night and day I pray constantly for you, building a memorial for you with my prayers. I know that you have wept for me, your spiritual father, and your tears are dear to me. I can’t wait to see you again! I’m filled with joy as I think of your strong faith that was passed down through your family line. It began with your grandmother Lois, who passed it on to your dear mother, Eunice. And it’s clear that you too are following in the footsteps of their godly example. I’m writing to encourage you to fan into a flame and rekindle the fire of the spiritual gift God imparted to you when I laid my hands upon you. For God will never give you the spirit of fear, but the Holy Spirit who gives you mighty power, love, and self-control. (TPT)
From: Sha’ul, an emissary of the Messiah Yeshua by God’s will, which holds forth a promise of life through being united with Messiah Yeshua To: Timothy, my dear son: Grace, mercy and shalom from God the Father and the Messiah Yeshua, our Lord. I give thanks to God, whom, like my forbears, I worship with a clean conscience, as I regularly remember you in my prayers night and day. I am reminded of your tears, and I long to see you, so that I might be filled with joy. I recall your sincere trust, the same trust that your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice had first; and I am convinced that you too now have this trust. For this reason, I am reminding you to fan the flame of God’s gift, which you received through s’mikhah from me. For God gave us a Spirit who produces not timidity, but power, love and self-discipline. (CJB)
The minute those words were spoken my mind cleared. I know in my heart of hearts that we are NOT called to be afraid of death or dying. We are NOT to wonder if someone will "make us sick" or if we should help someone because we "might get ill." And yet, that is exactly what is happening in our world. If we truly believe that Jesus came to HEAL us and give us LIFE, we need to walk in that strength and power.
My last several blogs have been about caring for those who are not like us. In this day and age it might mean leaving our shell and not being afraid to love on someone outside of our comfort zone. God didn't give up on us, why have we given up on others? Why are we afraid to help someone who "isn't vaccinated?" It's frustrating when we can't go see someone because we haven't "gotten a shot." If we call ourselves believers in HIS LIFE, and "aren't afraid of dying" than why do we live like we are afraid?
I admit, I have loved ones on this earth that I don't want to leave. I have business that "isn't finished" and I don't want to leave it for others. But to live in fear of dying is not healthy. And now, that is what the world has instilled in us. The world has caused us to panic to the point that we have lost our sense of community. We have lost our sense of trust in others. We have lost our sense of what it means to "take care of one another." We can't even smile at each other anymore because we have to wear a mask.
I'm tired friends. Tired of wondering who is going to question me next. I'm tired of the lack of trust. We have become so "smart" that we are acting dumb.
I realize that this is going to raise questions and issues for some. I'm not trying to be antagonistic. I'm just done. I want to focus on the GOOD NEWS of HIS LOVE and walk in HIS GRACE that I don't deserve. I want to share that LOVE and GRACE with those around me. I want them to know that JESUS cares. Not through sympathy, but with empathy and understanding.
And yes, part of me is scared to post this because well... what will people think. But, I know that I don't want to live in fear of what people think. So, post I will. As I continue to ponder, question and seek... May I understand HIM more. I want to live a life from a life of thankfulness and gratitude for ALL HE has done for me.
We sang a song this morning that I have not heard before. It is called Gratitude. Here is a link. It explains why I chose the picture of a lion. May it bless you and help you release your fear.
Love and blessings,